I miss my little Hayden so much!

This is one of the pictures of Hayden before he got his bone marrow transplant. He wasn't allowed to play on the floor, so they had to put a mat down on the floor for him. He was hooked up to IV's, so he couldn't go far either! But that nite I came to visit, he had his pillow and blanket on the mat and wanted me to lay down with him and go nite nite. So I did! We laid there for a short time and then got up to play. I will never ever forget that visit. My heart is aching so bad. I can't stop crying, afraid to go to sleep. I walk into Wal-Mart and see things that remind me of him and I break out crying. I can't even look at a package of Oreo Cookies and I cry. We loved to eat Oreo cookies together. I'd tell Hayden "You know I'm going to get fat eating these cookies, right?" He'd say "yep!" I can't accept that he is really gone from all of us. It tears my heart up to see my son grieving over the loss of his son, Trish over the loss of her son and how she had to watch Hayden's health turn from good to bad the entire time in the hospital, my Mom over the loss of her great-grandson, and my other 2 sons over the loss of their nephew. All over the hands of one careless person. Took him from us, before his time. When I go to bed now, I hold his blanket near to me. It smells just like him. I know in time that precious smell will be gone. But it's all I have to hold onto now. Yes, I know I'm a grown woman. But that is all I have left of Hayden to hold onto...his Cars blanket. Forgive me Chris and Trish for taking it. I miss holding my Baby! I love you Hayden!

One week in hospital for Hayden...

....and he doesn't like it! When people visit, he wants to leave! Poor lil' guy. Before anyone can visit, you HAVE TO HAVE the H1N1 shot. So...I guess that means I need to go get my shot at the Health Department before I can visit. NOT looking forward to it! Chris and I had to wipe down ALL of his toys, books, etc. before Chris could take them to the hospital. He was so excited to have his toys in the room with him! Trish is decorating the room with all the cards he has received so far!

He was supposed to get his port put in today, but they are waiting for test results to come back. I'll share the final diagnosis when they get the results back. They re-tested all his blood work! And with what they told the kids last week - I'm glad they did!!!

The above picture was taken the last time Hayden was here visiting with me. We had fun on my laptop computer taking pictures of us!

Hayden's Journey starts Monday....

Just got word from my son, Chris:

Hayden's white blood cells dropped even more and now they are in a rush for time. He will go to Children's Hospital in Washington, DC on Monday, Jan. 25th. They will be inserting a port into his chest and give him his first dose of Chemo. He will be there for a week. He may stay at the Ronald McDonald house after or may come home for a short stay. Then he will return to Children's for his bone marrow transplant. I will keep everyone informed.

Hayden celebrates his 3rd birthday on Sunday!

Thanks to EVERYONE for your prayers and support....please keep praying for Hayden!!!

Update on Hayden

I LOVE CHOCOLATE!!!!!



Just an update on my grandson, Hayden. Chris called to tell me that he went to see the Dr. at Children's Hospital in DC today.

One of his kidneys is smaller than the other. The Dr will begin blood testing family this weekend for the bone marrow match. If not, he will pull from the National List. The IV antibodies are not working. He wants Hayden to have chemotherapy with hopes it will help him when he receives the bone marrow transplant - with hopes it will stick! (Yes, he will lose all his hair.) He will have to stay at the Ronald McDonald House in DC for 3-4 months. He can't be no more than a half an hour from the hospital.

They are doing more testing today, and will be coming home tonight. So he will going back to Children's Hospital soon. I'll write more when I hear more.

PLEASE continue to pray for Hayden, please? Mom and Dad are having a really hard time accepting all this news. The rest of the family too. Hard to understand how a 2 year old can be so sick.

Thank you so much for all your prayers!!!

***I am having a card shower to fill Hayden's room when he is at the hospital. It will give him something to do and cheer up Mom and Dad. He loves Thomas the Train (his new bedroom is red and blue!)and Cars (Lightning McQueen!) He loves to color and write! He always gets GG's ink pens and writes for her! (I'm Nana and my Mom is GG for Great-Grandma!) He loves to blows kisses to everyone. If you would like to send Hayden a card, please email me for my address. Thanks again!!!